The Setback

We have had an unfortunate incident, a blip, a bit of a setback. OT has been recalled to custody for a few weeks for not complying with his licence.

I am disappointed and relieved.

Disappointed because I like having him around: his youth, humour and energy bring life into this empty house. I am disappointed for him too, he was so determined never to see the inside of a cell again and he is gutted that he has messed up.

I am also relieved because after the honeymoon period of the first fortnight I could see how much he was struggling. He wasn't coping with the fairly minimal responsibilities of keeping appointments and sticking to a schedule, after all that has all been done for him all of his life. He was finding inappropriate coping mechanisms to deal with the triggers he encounters in the community. My bright, funny, charming OT was subdued, tired, unhappy, unwell and avoiding the one person who would spot all that because he wasn't ready to deal with it yet.

So he is back in a place of safety. He has time to get healthy, get his head straight, think things through and make a better attempt at a life of freedom in three weeks' time.

Because sometimes in life you do get a dress rehearsal and this is just a setback.